Guide to Buying Children's Toys

Buying toys for children can be a daunting prospect, whether it's for your own kids or for someone else's. Like it or not, you are faced with choosing something that can be valued for a long time, something that's ''cool" and something that provides safe and engaging play from a plethora of offers arduously promoted on television, in catalogues and in kids magazines, sometimes with questionable consequences. Every parent has to do daily battle with the war cry "I want." whenever an item that is coveted by a child appears on the screen in front of him or her, especially if it's an item that has substantial peer value. Yet, after shelling out what in this day and age may feel like a king's ransom, that same valued trinket can be found laying in the dust, unwanted, within a remarkably short time.

Toys & Games So, how do you ensure your investment is wise? How can you make a quality choice? You can start by searching for toys at Myshopping.com.au where you will find a wide range of excellent choices for children of all ages and taste. Myshopping.com.au is one way to keep abreast of a market that moves very quickly.

Buying a child a toy however is not only about filling the void of their immediate "I want." Much of the decision involves the values that the buyer ? the giver ? wants to impart in making that choice.

Include your own values

From the youngest of ages, toys are what children learn from. It is in play where children learn many of the values we adults want them to carry forward into their future relationships. Play is what helps teach them that others have feelings, that sharing is a necessary human condition, that possession and ownership are rights and responsibilities. If we want our children to value our own contributions to the communities in which we live, we will more likely try to impart similar values through the choices we make for them. This is reflected through choices in educational toys, outdoor play, music, sport, fashion and many other pursuits.

A toy bought by a special relative or friend can often be regarded more highly by a child than other toys simply because of the meaning of the relationship: the toy representing that relationship in times of absence for example. Much loved toys often have special meaning attached to them, not because of the value of the toy itself, but because of its origins.

In sharp contrast, many toys purchased on the whim of the war cry "I want." are done so with the primary intention of bringing peace to the household and involve little of the purchaser's personal values in the actual choice. Sometimes this can lead the child to continue demanding that his or her needs are met with material acquisitions based on selfish desires, resulting in 'spoiling'.

Educational toys

While toys are for fun and play, they also help children in their educational, social, emotional, and physical development. As they become engaged with objects for their own amusement, they are also working on cognitive and motor skills, both important developmental processes in very young children and kids with some learning or physical challenges. As educational resources, toys that present challenges to children frequently stimulate their ability to reason.

Parents and other adults can get involved in playing with their children's toys too. These activities help babies exchange contact with others and builds their language skills. When adults interact with babies and their toys, they are helping babies learn that the toys exist even when they are not seen or heard. This helps in their development into play with their peers in pre-school, helping them understand rules of play and a sense of right and wrong. In play, toys empower children, permitting them to control their environment temporarily and make decisions independently of adults.

There are a number of ways to make choices in educational toys for children. A first step might be to consider their development at playschool, pre-school or school, and make choices that help in the child's development in that environment. Another consideration is to consider where the child's personal interest's lie and look in that interest area. Building toys, construction models, and sand and water toys can foster an interest in mathematics through volumes and measures. Books and board games that employ instructional cards can further an interest in reading and language. Writing and art interests can be developed with phonics toys, erasible writing products, colouring toys and model kits, craft kits and different painting mediums. Environmental, engineering and science interests can be met with trivia games, maps and puzzles, chemistry sets, telescopes, microscopes and advanced building sets. Music choices encompass karaoke, musical instruments and sing-along products, as well as music players.

Search Myshopping.com.au for educational toys in different categories and different price ranges for children of different age ranges.

Gaming and outdoor play

Clearly one of the most rapidly developing trends in toys, is that of computer and electronic gaming, which includes software purchases for desktop or laptop computers, Play station and X-Box gaming consoles and portable gaming products. These options provide a great many variables, with a huge number of titles available in each of the formats.

While computer gaming can be enormously engaging for children of all ages, its basic nature can frequently play against the idea of open sharing, as the computer gaming environment is often very private, and single-player oriented. This can develop into sibling squabbles and selfish behaviour on the part of the game owner. If you are considering buying electronic gaming as a gift for a child who is not your own child, it would be wise and prudent to clear the purchase with the parents first, as not all parents are comfortable with their children having these products.

A large part of children's play also ties in with having happy and healthy kids. Exercise is a widely recognised component of health, and is reported in much of the media as a declining activity in kids, contributing to an obesity problem in modern society. To foster regular exercise, it is important to promote outdoor play with children and this can be achieved with the choices of toy purchases. Many sporting activities evolve from toy purchases, and can include any number of ball games ranging from any of the football codes, basketball, netball, cricket, hockey, baseball and so on.

Other toys that encourage outdoor activity might include transport toys such as bikes and scooters, skates and skateboards, mechanically propelled cars and carts; athletic activities such as swings and slides; sand toys and water activities.

Safety first

Regardless of your relationship with the child for whom you are purchasing a toy, safety is an issue of paramount importance. It's imperative to review all of the safety information published with the toy's instructional literature. If the toy looks unsafe and there is no published literature about its operation, it would be wise to avoid that particular purchase. Danger lurks in the oddest of corners. The most common consideration of toy safety includes strings or cords that could wrap around a young child's neck, packaging with sharp corners or protruding wire ties. Very young children often put what may be interesting objects to them in their mouths. Small components can pose chocking hazards, as can plastic bags large enough to be placed over a head. Battery compartments should be secured with a screw, providing a safely locked housing.

Equally important with removing hazards that may be present, is the need to educate children on how to use toys safely when playing alone or with others. While it is important that kids should not be endangered, it is also important that they learn how to assess a risk and take steps to eliminate or minimise risks at the earliest of age?both to themselves and to others.

Age and Gender

One of the primary considerations for toy shopping is how to chose a toy that is suitable for a girl or boy, at a particular age. Most toy manufacturers discriminate by both gender and age in the advice they give for their toys. Myshopping.com.au lists toys under these descriptions. However, these guides are given as advice only, and may not necessarily reflect the readiness of your child for a particular product, or the ability of a particular product to satisfy your child's current needs. Please search Myshopping.com.au for a wide selection of toys, and to help you with your choices.

Pit Bulls Dangerous To Children?

We all know that something comes to mind whenever “pit bull” is mentioned. More often than not, that something is negative. A large part of the reason why so many of us have negative thoughts about pit bulls despite never having had a bad experience due to one is because of the media. This is why many of us tend to think of pit bulls as particularly aggressive dogs which has actually fueled a drive in some parts of the country to ban the breed altogether. Despite a constant beating in the press, here are some facts about pit bulls:

* Pit bulls are the # 1 breed in the country but do not rank #1 on biting

* Pit bulls are classified as having an average temperament with breeds such as the golden retriever actually being known to be more aggressive

* Pit bull attacks have been on the decline since 1997

Another common misperception surrounding the pit bull is that the breed simply is not safe around children. Frankly speaking, no breed of dog or cat is completely safe around children if left unsupervised. But, while the press highlights rare occurrences of pit bull attacks upon children, the fact remains that the breed is completely safe around children if the following precautions are taken:

* All action between children and pit bull supervised

* All dog toys are first picked up

* Watch how child treats dog

* Teach dog basic obedience

* Do not put animal in situations it does not like

Supervise All Interaction

It is nothing short of simple common sense to supervise a dog and a young child playing together. In fact, the child should never be left alone with the dog period. This is especially true with younger children. Almost every single recorded attack involving a pit bull (or any breed for that matter) and a child happened while the adult was not present.

Pick Up All Pet Toys

A pit bull, like any dog, is going to be possessive of their toys. While the pet owner can get away with playing with the toys, a child may be perceived as potential competition. Plus, a dog toy is not going to be the most sanitary of things for a child to play with so its just a good idea all the way around to pick up the pit bull’s toys before allowing a child into the area.

See How Child Interacts with Pit Bull

While a pit bull may have a better temperament than a golden retriever, it will have its limits just like any dog. It is not uncommon for children to be mean to dogs as they tend to punch and pull on everything they come into contact with during certain ages. The child must have a basic respect for dogs or else the pit bull is apt to nip at the child if it acts overly aggressive towards it. Children unfamiliar with dogs or having a fear of dogs should not under circumstances be left to play with a pit bull or any large breed for that matter.

Teach Pit Bull Basic Obedience

A pit bull must have a fundamental respect for the owner and its wishes if it is to be controlled properly. If the dog has not learned to respect your authority and do things like sit on command or lay down, then it should not be allowed around unfamiliar people—be they adult or child. A dog must be able to sit and allow itself to be pet by strangers if it is to be around children and any pit bull should be trained to lay down when they become too excited. Without these basic commands and a fundamental respect for the owner, a pit bull, like any large breed, would be a liability around children.

Do Not Make Dog Uncomfortable

There will just be some people that your pit bull may not like or be comfortable around. While some owners can be tempted to think that forcing the dog to interact with the stranger will eventually make things all right, it sets the stage for a bad situation. Pit bulls, like any dog breed, are largely instinctual. If a person makes them nervous for any reason, they are more likely to bite that person out of fear. It is best to keep nervous pit bulls in their own space rather than force them to interact with people that they do not like for some reason.

If these simple rules are adhered to, a pit bull can be perfectly safe around children. Being there to supervise the interaction really is the most important thing to remember. You should be able to tell if your dog is getting upset and be there to remove him or her from the situation when that happens. But remember—just as the dog needs to be trained in simple obedience, the children must be taught to have respect for the animals as well if the two are to ever get along and play safely together.

Emotional and Social Development

Many theorists have suggested the emotional development of a child, or the core of one’s self esteem needs to be understood and fostered at home and in the classroom. Teachers and parents should focus on children’s emotional development or the “feelings that generally have both physiological and cognitive elements which influence behavior” (Feldman, 2000, p. 329), at a young age. These feelings need to be positively reinforced to develop a high self-esteem through out the child’s life. Most theorists agree that there is a link between a child’s development and their respective emotional levels. The views of the theorists also clarify the most influential stages in a child’s life when emotional development is necessary and how this development reinforces a child’s self esteem. A child’s emotional development needs to be built at home and school in order to develop a high self-image.

By the time a child is three years old, he or she is an emotionally complex person who has experienced a wide range of emotions. As parents, teachers, and caregivers we need to help promote our children’s emotional development so that they will be able to develop healthy relationships with their peers and learn how to manage their emotions effectively. This will help them get the most benefit out of their learning and eventually adulthood development. A child’s emotional development begins with the relationship with their caregiver. The type of responses that a child receives from their first caregivers (i.e. parents, daycare providers) will determine how that child will learn to deal with their emotions later on in their live (Ashiabi, 2000). A child who has a secure relationship with their caregiver will initiate positive interactions and respond positively to initiations with others (Ashiabi, 2000). Conversely, a child who has an insecure relationship with his or her caregiver will show more negative emotions while interacting with others (Ashiabi, 2000).

Elizabeth Cady Stanton once said, “Self-development is a higher duty than self-sacrifice” (Quote, 2004). Having a good self worth or attitude about oneself can define self-esteem. Children with a “healthy” self-esteem feel, “that the important adults in their lives accept them, care about them, and would go out of their way to ensure that they are safe and well” (KidSource, 2004). In younger children, self-esteem is not measured by their self worth, but by how well the loved ones in their lives respect and respond to their particular needs. For example, children with a lack of role models or a lack of parental support tend to have a lower self-esteem because they feel that these adults do not accept or care about them. This is the main factor which children base their level of self-esteem on through out their childhood and then on into adulthood. An example of this can be seen in early childhood development of infants who respond and attach themselves to the adults who love and are responsible for them. In the magazine American Baby it states, “What’s usually the fastest way to soothe a crying baby? Snuggle together while gently stroking him. Your touch has an amazing power to communicate love” (Wu, 2004). What this is pointing out is that the infant is responding to the trusted adult’s touch basing its emotional development on this form of communication and overall establishing the child’s future trust and self-esteem.

One big question about self-esteem is, “The more you praise your child, and the more self esteem your child will have. This is correct, isn't it?” (Cyperparent, 2004). The answer to this question is not as simple it seems. It has been said that if you continuously praise a child, it may make the child question the sincerity of that adult, causing them to soon dismiss these praises as “fake” and eventually hindering their self esteem. Even young children can see through excessive praise and flattery (KidSource, 2004). This is very important in today’s classroom. Research suggests that we should praise, but also challenge and encourage the student to take risks. Praising your children and your students should be only one aspect of raising self-esteem. The main aspect of this development should focus on how, “Helping children develop self-esteem involves listening, accepting, and praising. Self-esteem comes from acceptance. Provide positive self-esteem. Help your children grow self-esteem” (KidSource, 2004). A child’s self-esteem is not something imprinted in their DNA when born, self esteem is established and planted by parents and teachers through a lot of time, dedication, and positive reinforcement. Remember that a child, also, does not and really cannot develop self-esteem over night. Self-Esteem is something that is trail and error for each child and with the positive help and influence of parents or teachers, a proper and high self esteem can be established, building upon each event through out their life, representing their emotional development.

It has been established for a long time that emotion does play a role in learning (Gewertz, 2003). Recent research has also shown that a deliberate approach to teaching social and emotional skills in the classroom increases test scores and grades, increases students’ enthusiasm and motivation to learn and reduces behavior problems. Children who are distracted by emotional issues do not learn effectively (Gewertz, 2003). By focusing on developing emotional and social skills, teachers and parents can help students to maximize their learning potential.

There are many ways a teacher can establish a child’s emotional development. As we have stated previously, children build their self-esteem and emotional development based of the adults who they are close to and whom they spend a lot of time with. Teachers need to encourage children by building upon their self-esteem in their lesson plans so that their students will feel comfortable and confident with themselves. A teacher can make their students feel more confident by giving each child a specific responsibility. This is not only exciting for the child, but it also provides an opportunity for the student to gain some ownership of the classroom. A teacher can also show the students to how to learn from past failed attempts (Research and Children, 2004). In order to make this work, a teacher needs to let go of their instinct to overprotect the students and allow them to be creative and encourage any questioning. Building or growing a child’s emotional development is different than teaching it. Teachers also have to keep in mind that they might be the sole provider for this form of development if the child is not receiving it at home. Thoroughly planning lessons around positive thinking will help to reinforce this theory.

There are many lesson plans teachers have access to via the internet. Most of these can easily be adapted to fit a teacher’s specific situation. The K-5 lessons range from a “Who am I Collage,” by Linda Bauck, which teaching the child who they are, to a “self esteem/class pride chain,” by Kimberlee Woodward, which teaches them teamwork and self worth. The collage allows the students to create and present a piece of work about them. This allows the students not only to talk about their interests and characteristics, but also to work on presentation skills with peers. The chain lesson plan allows the student to list five talents on separate strips of construction paper. Then with the teachers help they will be linked to form a chain. The students each present their talents to the class, then link the entire chain together. This serves as a reference point and a reminder throughout the year. A student can always look up and see that he does possess talents, and so do his peers. Lesson plans building child development can be found on the internet at sites such as www.eduref.org/, which these lesson plans were located at. Another route the teacher can look into is character education which is a theory based on teaching children character. Really the focus of the teacher should be to learn about emotional development then implement it into the classroom.

There are outlining stages for emotional development and children. Parents and by teachers need to understand these stages so that they can aid in building their children’s emotional development and positively mold children’s self esteem. Emotional Development is important to understand because it can really help the child all the way into adulthood. Amos Alcott once said, “The true teacher defends his pupils against his own personal influence” (Quote, 2004). Teachers and parents are responsible for the emotional development of the children and the influence they share with these children can affect the children’s lives forever.

Asperger’s Syndrome Children at School

Between the age of 6-18 children spend a third of each day at school, so it’s important to ensure they’re in the best environment for their needs. This is particularly true for children with Asperger’s Syndrome.

So what should parents/carers look for when choosing a school for their Asperger’s Syndrome child, or consider in their monitoring of the school environment?

Children with Asperger’s Syndrome cope best in schools with small class sizes. This option is less a reality these days, when Education systems worldwide are struggling to survive with less funding and increased consumer demand. However, there are many other procedures and practices you can monitor to make certain your child with Asperger’s Syndrome is being educated in an optimal setting.

You should ensure your Asperger Syndrome child’s school has an extensive, in-depth knowledge of Asperger’s Syndrome; from the Principal to the Classroom teacher, Administration staff and Ancillary staff. This guarantees that whoever has contact with your Asperger Syndrome child in the course of their school day is aware of your son/daughter’s needs and understands that Asperger’s Syndrome is a neurobiological disorder – not a behavioural issue. So ask what specific Asperger Syndrome training the staff at your child’s school has completed and check that this is updated regularly. This is particularly relevant for your son/daughter’s Classroom teacher. If no specific Asperger Syndrome training has been undertaken at your child’s school, insist that this is rectified promptly.

Check the anti-bullying policy of your child’s school. This must be a whole-school policy that has a proven and consistent grievance address policy, with successful follow-up procedures. The policy should tackle the needs of victims and actions of perpetrators alike. Zero tolerance for bullying.

Your child’s classroom should be aesthetically AS friendly, as well as having the curriculum structured and delivered in a manner that meets the needs of your child with Asperger’s Syndrome. This will include using visual aids and maintaining a low sensory “volume” in the classroom – minimising noise, light, smell and extremes in temperature. The Classroom teacher should be mindful of the fact that all social interaction will have a cumulative effect on your AS child – this will affect the successful outcome of group activities, seating arrangements and ‘buddy’ systems.

Your child’s school should have a strong Social Skills program in place, that your son/daughter with Asperger’s Syndrome participates in at least once a week for a minimum of 1 ½ hours. This program must incorporate:

• physical activity
• decoding language and facial expressions
• problem solving case-specific scenarios
• developing friendship skills
• group/team work

Ideally the Social Skills program should include Asperger’s Syndrome children’s non-disabled peers. With consistency and perseverance this skills-specific program will effect positive change in your child’s social behaviour.

The physical activity component will assist the Asperger Syndrome child’s co-ordination, fine and gross motor skills, spatial awareness, vestibular systems imbalance and physical fitness levels.

The language component should aim to assist the Asperger Syndrome child to recognise and decode literal or conflicting statements in our language e.g. idioms and oxymorons. It also assists your son/daughter in identifying the meanings of facial expressions and body language/gestures. This will help your child with Asperger’s Syndrome to develop the use of more appropriate facial expressions and body language in their interactions with their peers.

Problem solving specific scenarios that have occurred in the lives of children with Asperger’s Syndrome helps them to develop a “bank” of appropriate responses/reactions and strategies to use in real life situations. E.g. Your teacher tells you to hand in your project books after lunch so she can mark them, and you’ve left yours at home. What would you do? It helps to hear everyone’s answer, as this provides a non-judgemental forum for the Asperger Syndrome child; helping them to recognise their “first response” in stressful situations. Hearing that other children with Asperger’s Syndrome may react the same way helps your son/daughter feel less like “one of a kind”. Then, asking “What might be a better way to handle the situation?” develops a number of problem-solving options for your child to implement.

Discussions about what makes a good friend; what good friends do in various situations; how friends act; what friends say to each other; how friends share; how friends play together; how friends include each other in games etc, form the basis of teaching friendship skills. Again, using real-life scenarios of incidents that happen in the playground at school/home help Asperger Syndrome children to transfer their knowledge to their interactions with their peers. Specific skills need to be directly taught about appropriate ways to join a game; co-operating with others; turn taking and also subtle nuances like “bending” the rules of a game. Self recognition by the Asperger Syndrome child of their need for rigidness and rule following, and highlighting that not all children think this way helps to explain the often-confusing nature of the playground to your son/daughter. They may never be fully comfortable with games like this, but the knowledge gives them control over their choices.

Developing group work skills enables Asperger Syndrome children to participate more successfully in activities in class and at home. The “mechanics” of group work need to be explained to AS children in a step-by-step process for greatest understanding.

Regular access to an all-encompassing Social Skills program such as this, in a group comprising Asperger Syndrome children and their neurotypical peers provides your child with the building blocks of social dexterity for life. It also fosters tolerance and understanding in their neurotypical peers.

Your Asperger Syndrome child’s school should recognise the need for continuous, open communication between home and school. This can be achieved by a daily phone call between Special Education staff and parents/carers each day, with relevant information being relayed to your child’s Classroom teacher. Most parents/carers and professionals of Asperger Syndrome children understand that sometimes seemingly benign incidents in an AS child’s day (either before, during or after school) can have a huge impact on their behaviour. Knowing that all behaviour is a form of communication, we can’t possibly hope to understand the message the Asperger Syndrome child is trying to convey unless we have all the facts. Continual communication gives those caring for the Asperger child at school and home the “big picture”.

Schools should provide support for children with Asperger’s Syndrome as required, and deliver that support in an equitable manner. Remember though, your AS child may need that support provided in an alternative format e.g. instead of in-class teacher aide support, your child may function better with organisational support e.g. keeping track of when work is due in; helping them collect/collate research information etc. It’s imperative that you negotiate with the Asperger Syndrome child themselves to establish the most successful way to provide support.

Your child’s school should have a “safe space” your Asperger child can go to when they are stressed, anxious, angry or agitated. This “space” needs to be sensorily “quiet” with soft furnishings – a muted, calm environment. Accessing this “safe space” should never be used as a form of punishment; rather the AS child should be encouraged to remove him/her self from an escalating situation before overload and meltdown occur, and rewarded for using this strategy. The AS child shouldn’t be “rushed” or “hurried” to return to the classroom or activity – this will only increase their agitation. Patience is the key in the “safe space” strategy being successful. All children (Asperger Syndrome children included) strive to be the same as their peers, and this “internal driving force” ensures the AS child will rejoin his/her class as soon as they are physically/emotionally able to.

Just as neurotypical children differ from each other, so too no Asperger Syndrome children are exactly alike. Most of them however, experience periods of high/excess energy and will benefit from regular energy “burns” throughout the day. This could be in the form of a brisk walk; a short run/jog or a set of star jumps or other callisthenic exercise (skipping, hopping on alternate feet etc). The need to burn excess energy usually occurs about halfway through each classroom session (morning, middle and afternoon) and also just after each break-time (morning tea and lunch/recess). Your Asperger Syndrome child’s successful behaviour in the classroom can be greatly enhanced by implementing regular energy “burns” into their day. If a Teacher Aide/Assistant isn’t available to supervise this, an alternative is having the AS child run errands/messages for the Classroom teacher. However, it’s vital the child with Asperger’s Syndrome comes to recognise these periods of high/excess energy, and experiences the benefits of implementing regular energy burns into his/her day.

This list of school strategies is by no means comprehensive, nor is it intended to be. Rather, it’s meant to list the minimum accommodations every school should make for children with Asperger’s Syndrome. It is a foundation to build on in partnering with your child’s school to create an individual Education program for your AS child that allows him/her to achieve their fullest potential.

Teach Your Children to Respect You

The most important value you will ever teach your children is: to respect their parents. And since you cannot pass anything on that you don’t incorporate yourself, you will have to start by first respecting your children. If they don’t feel treated like a human being, worthy of respect and love, deserving of your attention, then their cooperation will be in short supply.

First, you show them respect. Second, you teach them to respect you.

So how to go about this in practice? What to do if your children complain about the food, insult you because you’re picking them up from the gym 10 minutes too late, or if they don’t want to clean up their own mess?

Let’s have a look at these situations one by one:

1. Are the kids complaining about the food? Do you hear a “bwerk” when they see what’s in the casserole? Well, you are no fool, are you? You just spent one hour in the kitchen preparing that meal. Before cooking, you spent one hour at the grocery store buying the food. Before that, you spent many hours on the job, earning the money to pay for that food. So you now start asking yourself, “Did I not give enough of myself for this meal?” Yes, you did! You do not owe it to them to prepare a warm meal every day. But you do owe it to yourself to get some respect from those for whom you make all these efforts. Enough is enough! You did your part of the deal, now it’s up to them. Teach your children to say “thank you” for every meal. If they have no “thank you” on offer but only muster a “bwerk,” then you are not making dinner for at least two days! Soon they’ll be begging you for a warm dinner, and God knows they will be very grateful when they finally get one on the third day! Never continue delivering a service that is not appreciated. You’d be a fool to do that! How does it feel to be toiling away behind the stove, all the while fearing your efforts and goodwill won’t be appreciated? This is no way to live! If they appreciate neither your efforts nor your cooking, then make them go without for 2 or 3 days, and see what happens.

2. Are the kids insulting you just because you’re ten minutes late when picking them up from the gym? Then stop picking them up from the gym for a few times! Make it clear to them that they have to appreciate your effort of taking them and picking them up. Don’t start an argument with them, for that doesn’t work. Don’t keep explaining time and time again that they should respect you, but rather show them by taking action. If they are unable to see the difference between the important facts (you are there to pick them up) and the unimportant facts (being ten minutes too late), then let them feel the difference. Next time around, simply don’t take them to the gym, so they will become aware of the difference and learn to appreciate what you are doing for them. Don’t settle for being treated like a slave. You are worthy of respect! Show them what it means to be a person who respects himself. Respect yourself and others will respect you.

3. Are the kids complaining that “there is nothing to eat” in the house, while the kitchen cupboards are bulging with food? What they mean, of course, is that THEIR favorite food is not available in large enough a quantity. Do your kids have this kind of complaints? Okay, here’s what you do: stop going to the grocery store for a while. That way the kids will have to first finish all the food in the fridge and in the cupboards (or go do some household shopping themselves, also an enlightening exercise). This also makes for an economical cleaning up of all those half-finished packs of crackers, biscuits, cheese, and the like. Then comes the next phase where there really is “nothing” left in the cupboards. Now is the time to go to the grocery store, and you can bet on it that they will appreciate the new arrivals! They will feel like there’s “so much to eat,” while in fact there’s less food than when they were complaining there was “nothing to eat.”

4. Are the kids putting tons of ketchup on their food, continuously ignoring your warnings to be more economical and eat healthier? Stop arguing about it, for that doesn’t work. Instead, stop buying ketchup all the time! For example, buy one bottle of ketchup per month and clearly tell your children that they’ll have to do with this one bottle for the whole month. When the bottle is done, it’s done, till next month comes around. If necessary, buy a bottle for each child and label it. That way your children will learn to regulate their “ketchup behavior.”

5. Are the kids ignoring your orders to put their shoes in the designated place? Do they go on leaving their shoes all around the house? Tell them this will be the last warning, and that from now on, any shoes found scattered around will be “launched” into the back yard. And then, stick to your promise! I had to do this once with my sun’s basketball shoes: I launched them outside. As it happened, that night it was raining cats and dogs. The next morning he cried, “What do I do now? My shoes are all wet!” I said to him, “Sun, this is your problem.” Believe me, I had to do this only once! Once your children know that you will do as you say, then you won’t have to do it. They will respect your word!

6. Are your children’s rooms a mess? You want the mess to be cleaned up? Don’t do it yourself! Your teenagers should clean up their own mess! So instead of arguing about it, tell them that they have to clean up their room before dinner on Saturday. That way you are giving them plenty of freedom to chose their own timing. Come Saturday evening dinnertime, go check if the room is tidy. If not, then there is no dinner for that child. After all, this was the deal: room to be cleaned BEFORE dinner. They can still clean their room right there and then, and have dinner when they’re done, but as long as the room is not clean there is no dinner. You could also say, “You clean your room and after that you can go out with your friends.” Be consistent and do as you say.

This is where many parents stumble when dealing with their children: they argue too much. They go on explaining the same thing dozens of times. Do you really think the kids didn’t understand what you were saying? If you have said something two times, then that’s enough. After the second time, you should ACT and not TALK.

Don’t argue with them! Never argue with a child. You are the parent, you are the one who decides. You can negotiate with your child, but don’t feel you need to explain yourself. Kids have much more energy than you do, and sooner or later you will give up (or give in) because your energy is spent while theirs is not. They know that and they will win the battle! Don’t get tempted to go into endless discussions with your child. Learn to act after the second warning. Be consistent! That’s the only way to get respect.

Home Safety for Toddlers and Small Children

Home Safety for Toddlers and Small Children

If you have toddlers in your home, then safety is obviously a big concern. They are big enough and mobile enough to go just about anywhere but they little to no understanding of how dangerous some things might be. So, you know that you need to toddler-proof your home but how do you go about it?

A great place to start is by placing ‘baby gates’ at the top and bottom of the stair case to prevent injuries. Be sure that you purchase a gate that is sturdy and can be easily fastened to the wall, railing or some other solid surface on or near the stairs. Even with a baby gate, never leave a toddler unattended near the stairs.

Next on the list to put child safety latches on all cupboard and cabinet doors the child could possibly reach. Remember, toddlers can climb! Pa extra attention the cabinets under the kitchen or bathroom sink or anyplace you store medicine, cleaning supplies, garden chemicals or poisons. In the garage or storage shed, store all weed killers and chemicals in a locked cabinet and place the key in a location where your child cannot find it.

When it comes to toddler safety, prevention is the best method. Store your child’s books and toys at their level so they do not have to climb to get to their favorite game or stuffed animal. If your child has a lamp, fan or other electrical appliance in his/her room, tuck cords safely behind furniture so the child cannot pull anything down on himself.

Avoid choking hazards by keeping young children away from small objects, pieces of toys, and small pieces of board games. Read manufacturer instructions for all toys and follow their guidelines. Buy only those toys and games that are appropriate for a child of a particular age. Place plastic safety plugs in electrical outlets so the child cannot stick his fingers in the outlet.

One aspect of home safety that is often overlooked is mildew and mold. Mildew and mold can cause serious illness and injury in adults and toddlers alike. Mold or mildew can be the cause of allergies and asthma in small children. Install a dehumidifier in any damp areas to mitigate the moisture in the air.

Top 20 Reasons Children Study Music

All you need to do is visit the kids’ audio/video section of your local CD shop and you will be bombarded with a multitude of educational enhancement products to buy. You may find ‘Baby Einstein’ or ‘Brainy Baby’ and an abundance of similar merchandise to make your child smarter. These types of goods can be a wonderful way to introduce music to your children before the age of three. However, nothing can replace private music lessons for a 3 to 9 year old.

The brain develops at a rapid rate between birth and three and is an essential window for the development of neurons. Therefore, encouraging musical exploration is an easy way to promote intellectual development.

Before the age of three, toy instruments can be an excellent introduction to the real thing and group musical play classes can prepare a child for later study. Singing at any age is highly beneficial and linguistic & musical awareness can begin as early as the fifth month of pregnancy when the fetal brain and ears are wide open to receive stimulus.

>From the age of 3 years old, a child’s brain circuits are mature enough to begin instrumental and/or vocal lessons. Voice is probably the most important instrument because singing is a tremendous gateway to confident communication and full self-expression.

The piano is usually the best musical instrument to start with because it does not require any specific fingering to play. However, children should choose instruments to play by the sounds they like. Kids will practice more if they like the sound of an instrument.

If your child chooses the piano, inexpensive electronic keyboards are a good way to begin because they are very affordable and portable. Many brands on the market today will display the notes on a digital screen while music is being played. These types of keyboards can greatly assist a child to begin to read musical notes and symbols. They also often have built in rhythm and song functions that make singing and dancing along with the music easy.

Since Howard Gardner’s “Frames of Mind: The Theory of Multiple Intelligences” in 1983 and Gordon Shaw and Francis Rauscher’s “Mozart Effect” in 1993, there has be much debate and research into whether or not music study can be linked to better academic performance.

You will find thousands of books, products, articles and websites discussing the advantages of studying music. For your convenience, the top 20 benefits reported for vocal and instrumental music study are listed below.

1. Music training has been linked to spatial-temporal reasoning skills. (I.e. ability to read a map, put puzzles together, form mental images, transform/visualize things in space that unfold over time, and recognize relationships between objects. These skills are often helpful in science, math, and chess.)

2. Musical symbols, structure, and rhythmic training utilize fractions, ratios, and proportions, which are all important in mathematical study.

3. Increases problem finding/solving, logic and thinking skills like analysis, evaluation and the linkage/organization of ideas

4. Optimizes brain neuron development & circuitry

5. Assists motor development especially coordination of hands, eyes and body

6. Expands multiple intelligences and helps students’ transfer study, cognitive and communication skills from subject to subject in any syllabus

7. Group orchestra or ensemble activities help promote cooperation, social harmony and teach kids discipline while working together toward a common goal.

8. Music augments memory. For example, most people learn their ABC’s by singing them. Repeating a tune in a predictable rhythmic song structure makes memorization easier.

9. Singing is a great way to aid/improve reading ability and instruction. Karaoke is a perfect example. Children may learn a song by ear (auditory) but words on a TV or computer screen provide a simultaneous visual anchor.

10. In vocal music learning rhythm, phrasing, and pitch greatly enhances language, pronunciation, grammar, and vocabulary skills. This is especially noticeable when using songs in first and second language study.

11. Improves critical reading and writing

12. Raises test scores, decreases performance anxiety, and teaches kids how to handle/manage stress during standardized exams

13. Helps children channel unexpressed and/or negative emotions in a positive way

14. Boosts creative thinking

15. Reading music and performing memorized pieces help children to think ahead

16. Improvisation helps people to “think on their feet”

17. Solo performance is connected to self-esteem & self-efficacy. (concept of self capacity) Children learn to reach for their very best.

18. When kids prepare and consistently practice for recital or performance, they work to sing/play without errors. They generally apply similar determination and perseverance to many future endeavors academic or otherwise.

19. Improves understanding of homework and enables a higher levels of concentration

20. Children who study music usually have a better attitude, are more motivated and are less intimidated by learning new things

Strong music reading, writing notation, sight singing (solfege), music theory, literacy, and moving the body to music are solid, transferable skills. Learning is a two-way street. For example, one can assume that mathematics can also develop music. Academic achievement links positively with musical achievement and vice versa.

As early as the 19th century, the visionary Dr. Maria Montessori included music and arts into her worldwide school curriculums to greatly enhance and accelerate learning.

‘Lorna Heyge, Ph.D., says: "While educational leaders turn to early childhood music because it promotes brain development, they will stay with music because of the joy and stimulation experienced in actual music making. Music learning requires total involvement-that is why it appeals so much to young children"